10 Questions with Sean Alistair
Sean Alistair is a queer, self-taught, Canadian-born artist currently residing in the Bavarian countryside of Germany. His art is a visual journal where he discusses the intense impact of how seemingly mundane or innocuous experiences can be to someone who is not only queer but also bipolar.
Each of Sean’s mixed media works is completely sewn and created by hand over hundreds of hours and focuses on material exploration, found objects, recycling, and reworking old paintings. Because he does not believe in keeping a large archive of his work, after 2-3 years, he will either rework or destroy his older paintings in order to create something new.
Due to his mental illness, Sean experiences prolonged periods of mania, which he has learned to utilize as a way to keep his concentration in order to finish his work. What is most important to him is that his works live and change with the light, angle, or distance they are viewed at.
Sean Alistair - Portrait
INTERVIEW
When and how did you start getting involved with visual arts?
Like many creative individuals, there isn't an exact date or time in which I can remember first picking up a paintbrush or pencil, creating has always been a language I used to express myself.
As a teenager, my manic need to create became even more intense; whilst working on multiple projects simultaneously, I would already be planning my next piece; this is something I have carried forth with me to this day. My brain works like an assembly line, which means I often struggle with anxiety surrounding the concept that I won't be able to complete every idea within my head.
During my formative years, my parents, when possible, would always buy me the art supplies I desired. However, due to a series of extremely serious health issues within the family, we went through some financial difficulties. When there were no excess funds for such art supplies, my parents encouraged me to be resourceful and to use anything and everything I could find within the house. From my mom's nail polishes, sewing supplies, and scraps of wood or wire, everything was fair game. What I quickly learned was that the work I created with the limited supplies was not only stronger but also more interesting.
Although I was consistently creative throughout my early adult life, I didn't start to focus on my artistic practice until about eight years ago. Without any direction, I started by focusing only on material experimentation and exploration rather than limiting myself to one style or material. Regardless of how many different styles I tried, I always found myself drawn towards mixed media. I admire artists who can focus their craft on a concise selection of materials; however, for me, I need a limitless selection to properly articulate my ideas.
The Effects of Failure Nr1, Mixed Media, 80x99 cm, 2023 © Sean Alistair
You are originally from Canada, but you currently reside in Bavaria, Germany. How do these experiences influence your work?
The goal of immigrating to Germany was simply to be reunited with my husband, however, the day that I was going to book my flight, the world went into its first lockdown; thus, we were separated for nine months. During the brief moment when restrictions were relaxed, I applied for a Visa, booked a flight, and, for the first time in my life, flew not only to Europe but to a country where I didn't speak the language.
I will not lie; I was terrified of how I was going to be perceived by my then-boyfriend's family and community. However, what I was introduced to was a family and community that instantly embraced me; it didn't matter that I was gay or this weird, bald, heavily tattooed artist from Canada. The moment I arrived, I was one of them.
What was the most profound thing was how patient and kind everyone was to me, and when I had my first art show in Germany, the entire town showed up to support me. Although I was often extremely overwhelmed, I started to channel these thoughts and emotions into my work. On a micro level, I began within my work to explore feelings such as loneliness, isolation, or insecurity.
However, after those feelings started to fade, I began to explore other ideas on a macro level, such as the impact of war and comparing and contrasting my home country to the one I'm currently living in.
Moving to Germany completely opened my eyes and gave me a new perspective on the world. I went from being a native resident to an immigrant and from speaking the language to needing to find a new way to communicate. Before this move, I never acknowledged how sheltered I was from the current events of the world.
It was surreal living in a country with quite an intense history, seeing buildings that are still demolished from the war or having the city shut down due to unearthed WW2 bombs. My husband and I were living in East Germany when the War with Ukraine started, and I vividly remember seeing the fighter jets fly above us to fortify the borders.
Something my Dad always says to me is, "we don't know, what we don't know" and I had no idea what I didn't know of the world before immigrating. The impact of flipping my life upside down for love and moving to Germany has had an indescribable impact on the work that I now create, and although challenging, I am incredibly grateful for the journey.
Let's talk about your work. Can you explain what your idea is and how you are working on it?
My goal as an artist is to be the antithesis of nihilism whilst creating work that is impossible for Artificial Intelligence to replicate. In a world with an ever-decreasing attention span, I want to create something that can only be appreciated when one takes the time to truly look at it. Recently, I was told that the concepts behind my work weren't obvious enough, while in reality, that is the point. I intentionally create works that, on a surface level, are graphic and easily recognizable, but the longer one looks at them, the more that is revealed. Every choice is intentional; whether a line is perfect or an edge of the fabric is raw and left to fall apart, there is a reason for every decision.
I utilize my paintings as a sort of journal to ask the questions that haunt me, such as why I am here, what my purpose is, and why this is happening. This is because I know that if I am feeling this way or thinking these things, there is someone else out there thinking or feeling the same way.
The Psychological Damaged Inflicted by Gaslighting Nr2, mixed media, 30x40 cm, 2023 © Sean Alistair
Sadness Disease, Mixed media, 35x70 cm, 2023 © Sean Alistair
Where do you find inspiration for your work, and what is your creative process like?
Visually, my work is heavily inspired by high fashion and the Couture houses since I rely so much on textile manipulation and surface design. The decade I spent working in fashion as a Visual Merchandiser has had the greatest influence on my work. It was never the actual garments themselves but how the fabrics were treated. I strive to combine classical embroidery and beading techniques with more traditional materials while always adding something unexpected to create a visceral viewing experience. I often use textural or visual opposites to hammer a point; for example, if there is soft, there will be hard; if there is shiny, there will be rough, and if there is a clean line, there will also be a paint stroke that disrupts it.
I like to start each series by exploring what is giving me the deepest sense of anxiety and keeping me up at night. Since I am already obsessing over a chosen topic, I find it is the most cathartic experience to further explore it, and because every painting takes so long to create, the ideas and themes naturally continue to evolve and change.
I never limit myself from where I find inspiration; perhaps the color palette was inspired by the cinematography of my favorite show or the background references vintage wallpaper. This year, I have started to create a seasonal journal where I go into great depth behind the inspirations of each work as well as what I have been up to. I send the zine out by request but afterward, they live on my website under the "Journal" tab for all to view.
In your work, you use different approaches and techniques, mostly reworking older pieces and incorporating found objects and materials. What messages do you want to convey?
Even though we are informed, every day of the tragedies committed around the world and how fleeting life is, our modern society chooses to obsess over maintaining youth instead of cherishing and celebrating the gift that is age. The human condition is that of adding layers of experiences one after another, and although we often strive for new beginnings and fresh starts, the past is always something that is prevalent and with us. It is this energy that I try to capture within my work.
Thus, I fundamentally don't believe in keeping a personal archive of all my work and prefer to only keep a painting for up to two or three years before I rework it or add another experience on top of it. Sometimes I maintain and refine the original concept, but often, the additions are completely unrelated. I mainly use materials that are either second-hand or vintage because I think the natural age of the material creates a more interesting effect. The intent is to remind the viewer of the beauty of life and the blessing that is the experience of aging.
Die Kleinen Blümchen Nr3, Mixed Media, 30x40 cm, 2023 © Sean Alistair
Why do you use this visual language? And how has it evolved over the years?
I use this visual language because it is the only language I know; I have always been this way. I will admit that over the years I have been influenced by aesthetic pages on social media and have wished to have a less chaotic style and I have also tried a few times to emulate these pages or my favorite artists. However, after a few weeks of only painting watercolors, I would have the desire to do something extremely chaotic and destroy the perfect paintings I had just completed.
It has taken me a long time to realize that it is just who I am as an artist, and I must lean into my chaotic process. I don't like when a painting is too perfect, and I always desire to mess it up somehow. When someone asks me about the inspiration behind a piece or asks me what kind of art I make, I always become anxious because I still haven't found the best way to explain myself. I just end up showing a photo and invite them to a show.
Within the past year, I have leaned into the fact that I not only rework old paintings but also never limit myself to a small set of materials or techniques. However, I have found that keeping my subject matter limited helps give my work more cohesion. By utilizing eyes or portraits, I can use whatever technique I desire within the shapes of the subject matter.
Really, over the past few years, all that has changed beyond developing my skills is the acceptance of who I am. I truly believe we all know who we are at a deeper level; we just need the time to accept and embrace it whilst stopping comparing ourselves to others.
In your work, you touch upon your condition as a queer bipolar artist. What do you hope that the public takes away from your work?
I believe the only way to create a more understanding, empathetic, and tolerant world is to share our stories. I strive to create work that discusses seemingly innocuous topics in a way that is sensitive and nuanced. The key, I feel, with storytelling is to simultaneously acknowledge one's challenges whilst acknowledging one's privileges. What may be easy for us may be extremely challenging for others, and although our situation may be hard, there usually is someone out there who is having an even worse time. I think it would be inauthentic and problematic to explore topics that I have no experience in, so I stick to what I know but express it in a way that is relatable to a wider audience.
In my experience, people are homophobic, transphobic, racist, or xenophobic because they don't know someone personally. It is human nature to be afraid of what we don't know, and unfortunately, the media only helps create and maintain an extremely divisive world. So, if I would like there to be more understanding, kindness, and tolerance towards queer people or people suffering from a mental illness, I must tell my story.
Anonymous Portrait Nr 9, Mixed Media, 83x83 cm, 2022 © Sean Alistair
Anonymous Portrait Nr 15, mixed media, 77x77 cm, 2023 © Sean Alistair
What are you working on now, and what are your plans for the future in terms of new projects?
Currently, the biggest project for not only me but also my husband is to have a child. Although this isn't directly connected to the development of my artistic pursuits, becoming a parent is something on a personal level that I've wanted my entire life.
In Germany, there is partial IVF funding for heterosexual and lesbian couples; however, surrogacy is not possible here, which means this funding does not pertain to us. Canada is renowned worldwide for how supportive it is for gay couples to have a child of their own. Thus, my husband and I have chosen to leave everything we have built here in Germany and immigrate to Canada to complete our little family. It is possible to do the entire process from abroad, but it is not only extremely challenging but also more expensive.
My goal with the journey is to document the entire process of what is entailed for same-sex couples to have a family. Surprisingly enough, when we have expressed our plans, we have had more support from heterosexual people than within the queer community. Gay people telling other gay people that they want a child is similar to straight people telling other straight people they don't want a child; the responses more often or not are "Why are you going to ruin your life?", "Why are you trying to be straight?", "That is too hetero-normative for me." or "Please don't make me hold your baby!".
But both my husband and I feel it is important for there to be more gay parents and maybe one-day gay grandparents.
Do you have any upcoming shows or collaborations you are looking forward to?
Fortunately, this year has been an extremely busy one for me, with eight gallery shows and a handful of workshops. I am looking forward to spending the last few months of the year in Germany, working in my studio on new pieces before immigrating back to Canada. I will be bringing my entire portfolio of work back with me, and I plan on showing it there.
I have already started creating works that document the entire journey both my husband and I are on, and once the process is finished, I plan to exhibit the work either in Canada or Germany. As far as I know, I have never really seen any representation of what it takes for the average gay couple to have a child. In North America, we are well aware of all the gay celebrities who go through the surrogacy process, but it's much harder for gay couples who aren't extremely wealthy or Northern American to have a child. This will be my most important, vulnerable, and challenging work to date.
Anonymous Portrait Nr 2, mixed media, 60x89 cm, 2023 © Sean Alistair
Finally, where do you see yourself five years from now?
Five years from now, I hope to proudly say that I am exhausted from juggling my art career and parenthood.
I will never stop creating work and would like to continue the relationships I have made in both America and Europe with other artists and galleries. For an artist who is self-taught with little to no connections within the art world when I started, I have met some incredible people who have afforded me some amazing opportunities. I remember every kind person, every donated material, and every visitor to my shows, and carry those experiences with me. I am always the most excited to show a finished work to the person who donated the materials to me; I think it's the best way to say thank you.
Even though I am, in fact, a minority with many barriers in front of me, I am painfully aware of the privileges I do have and strive to utilize them in any way I can to help my community. My dream has always been to create some sort of fund or financial aid for those within the Queer community. Perhaps it is to help same-sex couples become parents or to afford Trans youth the medications or surgeries they need. Whatever it may be, I just want to be a part of the solution and do some good in this world.
Lastly, my biggest passion outside my personal artistic development is removing and breaking down barriers set by our society that favor those who can afford an expensive education. This year my husband and I started hosting affordable "Introduction to Art Making" workshops where I share as much valuable information to kick-start a few artistic journeys. I strongly advocate for being self-taught and believe that an arts education is "a way" not "the only way".
Artist’s Talk
Al-Tiba9 Interviews is a promotional platform for artists to articulate their vision and engage them with our diverse readership through a published art dialogue. The artists are interviewed by Mohamed Benhadj, the founder & curator of Al-Tiba9, to highlight their artistic careers and introduce them to the international contemporary art scene across our vast network of museums, galleries, art professionals, art dealers, collectors, and art lovers across the globe.
